Wednesday 22 August 2012

Rape is rape. Choice is personal.




We live in the 21st century and yet it may as well be the dark ages when people like congressman Todd Akin come out and claim “a women’s body can block an unwanted pregnancy during rape” in what he has termed legitimate rape. Deplorable and inhumane don’t even begin to describe these claims. The words ‘legitimate’ and ‘rape’ should never appear in the same sentence. The idea that someone asks to be raped is disgusting. No means no regardless of who it comes from. A person’s body is not property; nobody has a right to use or abuse it as they please. 

Nobody except those who are victims of rape know what it feels like to have their entire world turned upside down. Or understand that regardless of how you think you may react you will never know until in a situation nobody should ever find themselves in. Rape is quite often a silent crime in that the victim is too young, scared or even ashamed to come forward. It is a crime that happens more often than any of us can comprehend. And it is never, under any circumstances legitimate. 

And if these claims are not offensive enough there is also the debate over whether a woman has the right to abort a child conceived as a result of a rape. Is it not enough that these women have been violated in the most personal and violent way possible; but a portion of society also believes they have the right to tell said women that they must carry, deliver and possibly raise their rapist’s child? Nobody, especially a man, has the right to impose such a personal choice on a woman. This lack of ability to choose only adds to the disrespect and violation they have already experienced.

There is a lot of talk about anti-abortion on religious grounds. However religion is as individual and personal as our bodies and should not determine something for everyone. Why is more value placed on one set of beliefs over another? Why do the beliefs of one religion get to make decisions for society as a whole when one religion does not represent society as a whole? We should all have the right to choose our own destiny; decide what happens to our own bodies based on our own beliefs. Beliefs and rights are two completely different things and the former should not have an impact on that later. Everyone has their own moral code. Everyone is entitled to those moral codes. But nobody is entitled to impose those moral codes on someone else. The right to choose has nothing to do with our own personal beliefs and yet everything to do with our own personal choices. The right to choose not to impose. Our lives, our bodies, our choice.

There are way too many circumstances to take in consideration to say that one way is suitable for all people. It's not about science; it's about law. It's not about religion; it's about choice. It should only be about choice. Pro-life & pro-choice are two different things. Everyone should have the right to choose; how they exercise that right is up to them.

When discussing the rights of society why does it matter what you or I individually think. The rights of society are about representing everyone and protecting the greater good. The option should be there for everyone to make their own decisions on issues that relate directly and specifically to their own lives and bodies. What each of us believe individually is important to us but it is not relevant to whether or not as a society we should have the right to choose. How any of us feel about, in this case, abortion is not the issue. The issue is whether or not we have the legal right to our beliefs. Currently not everyone does have that legal right; not everyone’s beliefs are represented and therefore they do not have a choice over the destiny of their own bodies.

There is this fear of speaking out about such issues because they are controversial and there is such a definitive voice already established in the debate. However if the right to choose is not discussed publicly and rationally; if people don't fight for this right, then nothing will ever change. If the victims of rape are not given a voice; the safety to speak out when their very definition of safety has been shattered then perpetrators will continue to walk free and victims will continue to suffer the additional pain of knowing they are out there.

“All right, think of it this way. Every time you talk about yourself, you use the word we. We want this, we want that. You don't even know how to think of yourself as a single individual. You don't say, I want this, or I am Hugh. We are all separate individuals. I am Geordi. I choose what I want to do with my life. I make decisions for myself. For somebody like me, losing that sense of individuality is almost worse than dying.”
~Star Trek: The Next Generation – ‘I, Borg’~

Monday 20 August 2012

NOH8




Love is not a right, it’s an emotion. We don’t choose who we love, love chooses us. Nobody should have to fight for the right to human emotion. Marriage is not homosexual, it’s a union. Love is not homosexual, it’s an emotion. A percentage of people are homosexual, but that is only one part of who they are, not what defines them. What defines a person is not who they love, but how they treat others and live their lives. Sexuality, gender, race, religion or political views should not be characteristics that hierarchy people and determine which rights they are and aren’t entitled to. Everyone should be born to the same set of rights. If someone chooses to forfeit these rights that is their choice; but we should not be denied them simply on the basis of what we are.

People too often hide behind ‘freedom of speech’, but this is not a right to say whatever you want, to whoever you want and damn the consequences. “With great power comes great responsibility.” People may have the broader right to a freedom of speech but we are not the only ones on the planet and with that right comes the responsibility to consider how your comments affect others. Freedom of speech is not a right to hurt or belittle others just because you can. I do not find an informed opinion different to my own insulting. Everyone has a right to an informed opinion. People do not however have a right to enforce an opinion rooted in ignorance on someone who is living their lives to the best of their ability and harming nobody. There are legal activities that I don’t partake in but am hardly going to deny people the right to choose to take part in those activities for themselves. Nor am I going to turn away a potential friend because they do not live up to my life choices. We would be a planet of lonely people if we only let people in who agreed with us. My life is mine to live and yours is yours; THAT is the beauty of freedom.

Those who are homosexual are part of the same society as those who are heterosexual. They breathe the same air, they need to eat and drink to survive, they go to school, have jobs and whether some people like it or not they fall in love. They have the right to marry, start families and be represented just like straight people do. Rights that the heterosexual members of community are born to and take for granted.

Marriage:

Nobody is asking the generic you to marry someone of the same gender or even attend a wedding between a same sex couple. To those who say that gays are ruining the sanctity of marriage; take a look at the divorce rates among the heterosexual community before you make judgement on what defines and takes away from the sanctity of marriage. Sure people grow apart, and for these people to end a marriage or relationship is the right decision. But consider that there are people marrying and divorcing not only years later as they grow apart but in the course of months, weeks and even days. It is these whirlwind unions that make a mockery of marriage and commitment. If two consenting adults are in a loving, committed relationship it is this, not the gender of the couple in question that matters. Marriage is a commitment between people who are in love with each other. Nobody says ‘straight marriage’ so why should anyone say ‘gay marriage’. Hopefully one day marriage will be a single rather than segregated term.

Families:

Just as everyone should have the right to marry the person they love they should have the right to start a family with that person if they wish. Same sex couples may not be able to procreate in the most commonly accepted manner; but neither can all heterosexual couples. Does this mean that they are not entitled to start a family either? There are sperm donors, surrogate mothers, IVF and adoption: all options freely open to heterosexual couples or even single people wishing to start a family. These options should be equally available to same sex couples wishing to start a family.

To those who say that same sex couples ruin the sanctity of family; would you prefer a child grow up in an abusive heterosexual household or a loving homosexual one? To those who think that a child growing up with gay parents will ‘turn’ them gay: 1/ you don’t choose your sexuality, you are born to it; and 2/ where do you think gay people come from (generally straight parents).

Would you turn away your child or a long-time friend because you find out they are gay? They are the same person you have always known; only difference is who you now know they love. Words leave scars and these scars are often the hardest to bear. Your hate may be what pushes someone, be they someone you know or a complete stranger reading your words online, over the edge and ends with them taking their lives. Put yourself in their shoes: how would YOU like someone to tell you that you weren’t allowed to marry the person you love because it makes them uncomfortable.

“Sometimes we're strong, sometimes we're weak
Sometimes we're hurt and it cuts deep
We live this life breath to breath
We're all the same, we all bleed red”
~Bleed Red: Ronnie Dunn~